If I wore an over-sized black fedora, John Lennon circular sunglasses, a yellow and black patterned silk blouse, Spandex, and leather loafers, I'd look insane. You'd want to commit me, if only to get me out of those clothes and into a fashionably less-offensive straitjacket. But when Beyonce wears those things? Together? She looks amazing. The new mom was spotted in Brooklyn, New York yesterday with baby Blue Ivy in one of those papoose things. Clearly, Blue Ivy was Beyonce's best accessory, and even though she was pretty shielded from the photogs, we can see that the adorable infant is wearing a black and orange head scarf (tre chic!) and tiny little blue jeans.
Beyonce's look is hard to pull off when thought about as a whole, but when you break it down into pieces, the outfit is way less intimidating. Let's start with the sunglasses.
New moms are tired. More tired than they've ever been in their entire lives. A pair of gigantic sunglasses can hide the dark circles and the bloodshot eyes better than any makeup in the world. Wear them everywhere and often. You won't regret it.
Then there's Beyonce's shorts. Or are they Spandex? Or maybe they're just straight up Spanx? I can't tell. They're super tight and super short, that's all I really know for sure. And know what else? I love it. Who wears short shorts? Beyonce wears short shorts. Maybe she was inspired by the Nair commercial from the '80s because she is rocking it. I'm sure they're comfy and all sorts of practical. They don't get caught in stuff like strollers and Baby Bjorns, they're easy to wash, kind of water repellent, and it doesn't matter that they don't have pockets, you can just stick things between your thigh and your Spandex and boom, your car keys are safe, sound, and secure.
So this summer, take a page out of Beyonce's book and try the short shorts and the big sunglasses. You can make it work, promise.
Are you going to try short shorts this summer?
Photo via Pacific Coast News